Calling all ghastly ghouls and spooky b*tches—the next episode of the Truly House of Beauty has arrived...and it’s a GHOST STORY! Of course it is, it’s the THIRTEENTH episode of this beauty skincare saga. That’s right, grab your vegan-buttered popcorn, we are going down a haunted path. Last time we chatted about how we shaved our super spicy hot pool boy right after Anna moved all the way from her teeny tiny town in Kansas into the Truly mansion. But like I said you vamps and tramps—this week is a bit more SCARY!
It’s Halloween weekend and the Truly babes are heading off to one of their glamorous parties: The Haunted Hollywood Beauty Bash. Prolific skincare brands from all over the world are attending to showcase their limited edition Halloween products, and of course to dress up in the skankiest outfits that are permitted only once a year. The Truly Babes were prepared to be the belles of the ball! As their pink limousine pulls up, the Truly babes start cascading down the marble staircase and onto the haunted lawn to showcase their perfect Halloween costumes. The first to step outside is Tyler: he’s giving you space cowboy West Hollywood realness. In a bedazzled cowboy hat and pink fringe wristlets, he’s serving the house down with his nipples popping out. Save a horse, ride a cowboy! Next up, we have our petite blondie treat Zara, and yes she just stepped out of an Austin Power’s flick. Zara is head-to-toe fembot extravaganza. A high pouf hairdo with fuzzy tits that shoots synthetic bullets at anyone with bad vibes, Zara is feeding the children what they want and deserve with this fit. Not even Mr. Powers can resist this babe! Grab your thermometers, Chloe is giving us a FEVER with her hot nurse fit. Yes, every Halloween group needs a classic sk*nky nurse. Chloe is no exception, her recent love affair with the pool boy has her feeling the heat. The tits are smushed (thanks to Acai Your Boobies), the butt is plump (from Buns of Glowry duh), and she’s ready to mend all the broken hearts she will cause in this costume. Tyler, Chloe, and Zara are waiting by the limo taking selfies in their hot fits. “Gosh, you both look SO good!” Tyler says to the girlies. “So do you! Love your nips!” says Chloe, giving them a little pinch. The chauffeur starts playing house music for them as they await Anna’s arrival. “What’s taking her so long?” wonders Zara. The feet start tapping, everyone’s looking at the time, even the chauffeur was able to get out of the car and do a few vinyasas. The impatience was starting to get unbearable until they heard the front door swing open and SCREAM! Anna is walking down the driveway, looking like a haunted zombie bride. The fabulous yet fragile three friends panic at the sight of something so….scary! Tyler runs under the limo, shaking in fear. Chloe projectile vomits out of despair. Zara’s eye twitches in disgust. “ANNA....why are you so scary?!” she asks. Anna replies with blood gushing from her mouth “What?! It’s Halloween!” Zara blows a whistle that she somehow just acquired “RED ALERT! Tyler. Chloe. Get your shiz together! This is a Truly Beauty emergency! We have GOT to get Anna out of this atrocious costume!” The three friends forcefully grab Anna faster than you can say oogie boogie and head back upstairs to the Truly closet.
Anna may be slightly trembling, but that isn’t going to stop Zara from hosing her off in the shower. “Anna, this party is important! We are Truly Beauty...not Truly SCARY! Here, since it’s Halloween, I want you to scrub off that gunk with our new Plumpkin Spice Body Polish.” Anna grabs this jar of black and orange polish, it fills the room with a cinnamon pumpkin aroma that can only be described as autumn heaven. Anna uses the polish all over her body, wiping away all that makeup and brightening her skin. She feels like a plumpkin princess! Zara hands her some towels and leaves the room. Anna opens the door to her bedroom and is greeted by two overly excited air signs—Tyler and Chloe. “Honey, I’ve been DYING to get someone in this costume I made—but Zara and Chloe both look like garbage in green. I think this would suit you just right! It’s time to get HAWT!” says Tyler, as he hands her something so green and sparkly that her eyes tear up a bit. As she grazes her fingers over this fine material, Chloe opens a jar of this purple and green spooky cream. It’s whipped, buttery, and smells just like marshmallows. “We came up with this one for Halloween, yes...it’s a marshmallow body butter! Put this Marsh-Mellow Adaptogenic Body Butter all over, you’ll smell like the season and your skin will be GLOWING!” says Chloe. Anna takes some of this whipped butter and rubs it all over herself, smelling the candy-scented dream cream. “WOW! I feel amazing!” she says as Tyler and Chloe leave her to change. “Let’s hope that works.” says Tyler, as he and Chloe head back outside.
Tyler, Zara, and Chloe are back to tapping their feet as they anxiously await a refreshed Anna. “I really hope she looks good this time!” Zara says with a slight worry. All the worry dissolves as Anna swings open the grand Truly doors and steps outside. Glistening in green, Anna is delivering a full Tinkerbell fantasy. Her hair is shimmering in the moonlight, her skin is glossy with hydration, and she smells fantastic. Her wings are billowing in the wind, making the illusion that she is flying with grace. “C’MON Tinkerbell hottie!” screams Chloe. Tyler is whistling like a werewolf, and Zara is slightly salivating like a thirsty vampire. Anna is now the hottest of the bunch! “Let’s go party, spooky b*tches!” she screams into the night as she holds her new Bad Witch Bundle. The four friends hop into the limo, and head out to Hollywood to cause mischief and mayhem.
That’s it for this haunted tale, you ghastly skincare ghouls! Stay tuned for the next episode of the Truly House of Beauty.